


Crash and Burn

by simone



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Death, Engagement, F/M, Heartbreak, Loss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-31
Updated: 2012-12-31
Packaged: 2017-11-23 02:10:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/616914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/simone/pseuds/simone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam's nightmares and how he copes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crash and Burn

He woke drenched in sweat, his limbs as soggy as overcooked pasta and his thick brown bangs slicked back from his forehead. Deep breaths he forced in and out, filling his battered lungs with ragged breath as he clutched the scratchy comforter to his chest. Dean lay quietly sleeping beside him, shirtless, with one arm cast leisurely towards Sam’s bed and the string of his necklace a thin dark line on the dip of his shoulder blades. Once the younger Winchester had caught his breath, he slowly made his way across the dingy motel room, desperate for the bottle of whiskey that plead his release from the steady solitary ache in his head and heart. 

The alcohol burned his throat, but Dean’s drinking habits had begun to rub off on him, and he hardly noticed the flavor anymore. With a tired gulp the amber escape was filched from its cheap plastic cup and he dropped it carelessly to the side table, collapsing back on the shitty mattress. Sam’s head throbbed, as it always did now. With each pulse of blood in his brain beckoned yet another part of her from the dusty corners of his mind. Ba-bum; the waves in her soft blonde hair. Ba-bum; the feel of her hot skin against his. Ba-bum; the taste of her lips when she kissed him over and over and over and... 

Sam squeezed his eyes shut, willing the tears to leave his sore eyes alone. Be more like Dean, be strong like your big brother, he told himself. He clutched his forehead until his fingertips turned white with the strain of it. 

In a second he was back in college. The steady beat of crappy Halloween music played in the background, the shrill yelps and excited laughs of the carefree party-goers around him. “What would I do without you?” he spoke in awe to the girl in front of him. She looked stunning, even if she was dressed in a faux nurse’s uniform from the Halloween Store a block and a half away from campus. 

“Crash,” she laughed, “and burn!” He smiled, pressing his lips to hers to shut her teasing mouth up. He truly would be lost without her; he would drink to that tonight. Lost and most of all alone. His mind came back to the sheets beneath him, the sweat drying on his forehead, the darkness of the room swallowing him. 

Lost and alone, with only the familiar hand of his brother reaching protectively towards him in the bed to the left. He really did crash without Jess to pick him back up and remind him of what he is truly worth. But the only one burning was her, suspended to the ceiling, with her blood left to drip down in his dreams and remind him of the one regret he will carry forever. Sam still kept that engagement ring in his pocket, silver, with only one glittering diamond in the middle, for a girl he was far too late to save.


End file.
